17 November 2011

You know who you are

There is an individual that I know.  Growing up, I was very close to this particular individual and loved them very much.  While I still love this person, I have lost virtually respect for them recently.  See, I have a history of being a big softie that takes people back time after time.  I have a tender heart (even though I try to look/act tough) and I get my feelings hurt easily, but I tend to let people get close to me again and again even after they have done things to be hurtful.  I do have a few things that are crazy important to me though, and those lines you do not cross.  One of them is:



I WILL find out and we may not be able to remain friends.  Sadly, this is the case in the situation at hand.  I have found out and, I’m not going to pretend that I’m not sad.  Frankly, I am hurt that you would cut me out like this.  I am hurt that you would then try to cover it up with lies (multiple).  I am hurt that you would think I am stupid enough to not notice.  Mostly, I am hurt that you have done all of this to the people I love and care most about in the entire world.  My family.  Even though I have a really hard time letting people back after they have lied to me, you and I have a long history.  We would have had a rocky recovery, but I think we might have been able to make it work.  You have taken those I try my hardest to protect and you have lied to them, and some of them have believed you.  This breaks my heart.  The fact that they don’t see you for what you are saddens me, but it isn’t my place to rat you out.  If I see you at a mutual event we are both attending, I will not stoop to your level.  I will be civil, and I will treat you with the same respect that I would treat a complete stranger.  Know that I will under no circumstances seek you out.  I will always be here for you if there is some unforeseen crisis in your life and you need me, but I will not be extending my hand only to have it slapped.  I feel like you have betrayed a bond that is precious, and that is unacceptable. 

I do want you to know, that I forgive you.  I forgive you, but I have to protect myself and the people who I trust and who mean the world to me, therefore I will not allow you to continue to be a presence in my life.  I am letting go of the anger and the baggage I have carried around with me over this.  I wish you happiness in your life with the people you have chosen as your family and friends.  I hope you’re happy with this life you’ve chosen and that it gives you relatively few struggles.  I hope you will be happy, healthy, and go all of the places you want to go in your life.  I will always try to remember the best of times, and I will try to forget the worst of times.  God be with you.


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